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Yeah, No. Not Happening.

How I Found Happiness Swearing Off Self-Improvement and Saying F*ck It All—and How You Can Too

ebook
1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available

The author of the acclaimed, bestselling In Praise of Difficult Women delivers a hilarious feminist manifesto that encourages us to reject “self-improvement” and instead learn to appreciate and flaunt our complex, and flawed, human selves.
Why are we so obsessed with being our so-called best selves? Because our modern culture force feeds women lies designed to heighten their insecurities: “You can do it all—crush it at work, at home, in the bedroom, at PTA and at Pilates—and because you can, you should. We can show you how!” 

Karen Karbo has had enough. She’s taking a stand against the cultural and societal pressures, marketing, and media influences that push us to spend endless time, energy and money trying to “fix” ourselves—a race that has no finish line and only further increases our send of self-dissatisfaction and loathing. “Yeah, no, not happening,” is her battle cry.

In this wickedly smart and entertaining book, Karbo explores how “self-improvery” evolved from the provenance of men to women. Recast as “consumers” in the 1920s, women, it turned out, could be seduced into buying anything that might improve not just their lives, but their sense of self-worth. Today, we smirk at Mad Men-era ads targeting 1950s housewives—even while savvy marketers, aided and abetted by social media “influencers,” peddle skin care “systems,” skinny tea, and regimens that promise to deliver endless happiness. We’re not simply seduced into dropping precious disposable income on empty promises; the underlying message is that we can’t possibly know what’s good for us, what we want, or who we should be. Calling BS, Karbo blows the lid off of this age-old trend and asks women to start embracing their awesomely imperfect selves.

There is no one more dangerous than a woman who doesn’t care what anyone thinks of her. Yeah, No, Not Happening is a call to arms to build a posse of dangerous women who swear off self-improvement and its peddlers. A welcome corrective to our inner-critic, Karbo’s manifesto will help women restore their sanity and reclaim their self-worth.

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    • Publisher's Weekly

      April 13, 2020
      In this funny, well-researched work, Karbo (In Praise of Difficult Women) explains how she ditched “self-improvery” and learned to live as her “true self.” While railing against “the great female self-improvement bamboozlement,” Karbo weaves in her own story of focusing on self-care and embracing imperfections, and details years of on-and-off-again dieting and struggles with anxiety. Her advice is straightforward and includes such tips such as “care for yourself like you would a beloved pet,” “wean yourself off compulsive phone checking,” and quit believing in antiquated relationship ideas like women “are too much and not enough.” She also asks readers to back away from social media and to stop spending money on beauty routines and unproven, expensive products such as so-called “skinny teas.” To bolster her points, she includes references to Brene Brown’s lectures on shame and cultural critic Ellen Willis’s 1970 “Women and the Myth of Consumerism,” as well as many interviews with women who have resisted “the longest con out there, self-improvement.” Readers interested in feminist-based self-help will learn from and be entertained by this empowering guide.

    • Booklist

      April 15, 2020
      The author of In Praise of Difficult Women (2018) attempts to set herself free of social expectations in the self-help book to end all self-help books. In a comic tone that lends a light touch to her serious intentions, Karbo argues that women in particular have been brainwashed by a consumer society and the glossy magazines that sell its fantasies into believing that we would be happier if only we were thinner, hotter, fitter, more productive, more creative, more organized, and less curmudgeonly. The problem, she maintains, is that the imaginary best self we are constantly pursuing into a retreating distance, is not only an illusion, but also prevents us from making friends with the intelligent, curious self that we are right now, the one inclined to prioritize self-respect over the approval of others. While Karbo spends more time identifying the problem than providing solutions, she does give the reader some intriguing perspectives on why self-improvement may be not just difficult but destructive.Women in Focus: The 19th in 2020(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2020, American Library Association.)

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  • English

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